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Life Lessons from Singing

Getting ready to perform in WSU's concerto night 2015
I love to sing! It is something I have always loved and a talent I have developed throughout my life thanks to my amazing parents and teachers. I have learned many life lessons along the way as I've learned how to sing. One of the greatest lessons I've learned is to be confident in myself and my abilities.

I think we all struggle with confidence at times. I know I do. The main thing I struggle with is confusing confidence with pride. I thought growing up that I was being prideful if I believed I was good at something. Actually, I'm still growing up and still get confused over the matter! In fact last Thursday night is when the whole pride vs. confidence thing really became clear to me, thanks to an amazing choral conductor I get to work with.

I am currently singing in a community choir in Provo called Millennial Choirs and Orchestras. It is an amazing choir. I am super impressed with the quality of the directors, music, and singers. It is also very intense and challenging! We are required to memorize all the music and the directors are only satisfied with perfection... which I actually love because I love growing as a singer.

We have a performance coming up this week so we have been working really hard to have our music ready. Some members of the choir...including myself at times.. have been feeling like they can't do it or that they aren't enough. I think our conductor knew some of us felt that way and he said something that made so much sense to me about confidence and pride.

He mentioned that society today is confused between confidence and pride. He then asked us as a choir to shout out words we associate with confidence. Here is what we came up with:
  • preparation
  • bravery
  • hard work
  • dedication
  • determination
  • strength 
  • worthy
He then asked us to do the same thing for the word pride:
  • comparison
  • selfish
  • stubborn
  • un-teachable 
  • arrogant

What I noticed is that all the words for confidence are positive and good and all the words for pride are negative. Confidence is a good thing! In fact relating it back to singing it is essential. I think nothing takes more confidence than performing in front of an audience. 

My amazing voice teacher Evelyn Harris that I have been studying with for about 7 years also taught me the importance of confidence. She coined the term "confident humility." She taught me in a way that built my confidence and self worth while still helping me grow and improve as a singer. She always believed in me even when I didn't believe in myself! And yes all those things can be done at the same time!!! We can be confidently humble and grow and become better without feeling discouraged and disliking ourselves.  I have found that change and growth work better when I am confident and believe in myself. Our little ones, husbands and all around us grow better that way too. Are we building them up with our thoughts, words, and actions? In order to build others up, we have to build ourselves up first. 

One last quote I just remembered! It kind of makes me laugh. Growing up when my mom would ask me to do something hard like practice the piano or clean my room I would say "I can't!!" She would always reply with this "Cans come in cans not it can'ts." My parents taught me that in order to accomplish something, I first had to tell myself "I can!" 

Whatever you are are trying to accomplish in your life... I believe you can!

Be you-tiful,

Cheryl




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